Chapter 18.
AN: I SED STUP FLAMMING! if u do den ur a fuken prep! fangz 2 raven 4 da help n stuf. u rok! n ur nut a prep. fangz for muh sewter! ps da oder eson dumbeldor swor is koz he trin 2 be gofik so der!
K: Oh, wow, thanks for clearing that up for me. It makes so much sense now.
L: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT NONE OF THAT MADE SENSE. D:
K: Really? Maybe I’m starting to understand “Goffik”. D:
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I woke up the next day in my coffin. I walked out of it and put on some black eyeliner, black eyesharrow, blood-bed lipstick and a black really low-cut leather dress that was all ripped and in stripes so you could see my belly. I was wearing a skull belly ring with black and red diamonds inside it.
K: Is there any article of clothing that you own that is NOT ripped?
L: Is there any reason you think people care what you’re wearing?
(Da night before Draco and I rent back to the skull (geddit skull koz im goffik n I like deth). Dumbeldore chased Vlodemort away. We flew there on our brooms. Mine was black and the broom-stuff was blood-red. There was lace all over it. Draco had a black MCR boom. We went back to our rooms and we had you-know-what to a Linkin Park song.)
K: Broom stuff? Sex to Linkin Park? This sounds highly unromantic. D:
L: One song? Poor Draco. Can’t last more than a few minutes.
Well anyway I went down to the Grate Hall. There all da walls were painted black and da tables were black too. But you fould see that there was pink pant underneath the black pant. And there were pastors of poser bands everywhere, like Ashlee Simpson and the Backstreet Boys.
K: Last time I checked, there were no posters in the Great Hall, nor was it pink. It was fairly gothic in structure. At any rate, you can’t see SHIT once you paint something black. Believe me, I’ve done it.
L: I’m really, really hoping there is a point to that paragraph.
“WTF!” I shouted going to sit next to B’loody Mary and Willow. B’loody Mary was wearing a black leather mini with a Good Chraloote t-shirt, black fishnets and black pointy boots. Willow was wearing a long gothic blak dress with blood red writing that was all lacy and came up to your thighs and black boots and fishnets. Vampire, Dracula and Draco came. We started to talk about who was sexier, Mikey or Gerard Way or Billie Joe Armstrong. The boys joined in cause they were bi.
K: Coming up to your thigh is considered long now?
L: Of COURSE there was no point! *headdesk*
B: njffgaer93]]]]]39rhjwO FBSA 32rtf’’g’[
L: Agreed.
“Those guys are so fucking hot.” Navel was saying as suddenly a gothic old man with a black beard and everything came. He was the same one who had chassed away Vlodemort yesterday. He had normal tan skin but he was wearing white foundation and he had died his hare black.
K: I dare to read that first sentence WITHOUT giggling. You raff, you roose.
“……………….DUMBLEDORE?1!” we all gasped.
K: Oh no, not DUMBLEDORE! He can’t be Goffik!
L: No words.
“WTF?” I shouted angrily. “I thought he was just wearing that to scare Volsemort!”
“Hello everyone.” he said happily. “As u can see I gave the room a makeover. Whjat do u fink about it?”
K: KILL YOURSELF DUMBLEDORE. I HAVE LOST ALL RESPECT FOR YOU. I LIKED THE DRUNK VERSION BETTER.
L: Why is goffik Dumbleydore so happy?
K: Maybe it’s his PPP incarnation?
Everyone from the poser table in Gryiffindoor started to cheer. Well we goths just looked at each other all disfusted and shook our heads. We couldn’t believe what a poser he was!1.
K: LIKE OMG, WE WERE SOOO GOTH BEFORE THEM. D:<
“BTW you can call me Albert.” HE CALLED AS WE LEFT to our classes.
L: JUST IN CASE YOU WERE NOT AWARE HOW HE INFORMED THEM. IN CASE YOU MISSED IT.
“What a fucking poser!” Draco shouted angrily as we we to Transfomation. We were holding hands. Vampire looked really jealous. I could see him crying blood in a gothic way (geddit, way lik Gerard) but I didn’t say anything. “I bet he’s havin a mid-life crisis!” Willow shouted.
K: Mid-life Crisis? Isn’t he like a fuck billion years old?
I was so fucking angry.
K: YOU AND ME BOTH, SISTAH, YOU AND ME BOTH.
L: If it’s a midlife crisis, it came about 100 years too late.
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