AN: u no wut!111 I dnot giv a fok wut u prepz fink abot me!1111 so stup flaming da foking story bichez!1111 fangz 2 raven 4 ur luv n sport n help i luv u gurl soz i kodnt update lol I wuz rly deprezzd n I silt muh rists I had 2 go 2 da hospital rraven u rok gurl!11111111111111111111
K: You already used that excuse, hon.
G: Why can’t you just get a fucking gun next time bitch.
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Every1 in the room stated to cry happly- I had saved them. Drako, Lucian, Serious bond Vampire all came to hug me. The nurse started to give them medicine.
K: Bond…Sirius Bond.
G: I thought you where hardcore ebony now your hugging?… poserrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
“Cum on Enoby.” said Proffesor Sinatra. She was wearing a gothic blak leader dress with a corset top and real vampir blood on it and fuking black platinum boots. “I have to tell you the fucking perdition.”
K: Right now? Seriously? In the Hospital Wing? You have no shame.
A: Fly me to the moon. Also, platinum is not black. It is white. AND IT IS METAL.
G: One Word... Bukkake.
I locked at Lucian, Serifs, Drake and Vampire. They nodded.
K: Serifs was just like ‘Fuck this noise I’mm go chill with my homie Goudy and Helvetica.’
It was a Typography/Designer pun. LAUGH DAMN YOU!
A: And Arial and Verdana aren't invited.
K: That because they were acting like Dingbats. BADUM TISH!
I smelled happily and went into a dark room. I had changed Profesor Sinister took out some black cards. She started to look into a black crucible ball. She said……………………… “Tara, I see drak times are near.” She said badly. She peered into da balls. “You see, you must go back in time.” She took out a Time-Toner like B’loody Mary had. “When Voldemint was in Hogwarts before he became powerful he gut his hearth borken. Now do you fink he would still become Volxemort if he was in love?” I shook my head. “U must go back in time and sedouce him. It is the only way. If he is still evil then you must kill him. You can come to my room tomorrow and you can do it.”
K: Mmm…Voldemints.
Holy crap, she’s using that ‘broken heart’ ploy?
A: I wonder if the Death Eaters always have fresh breath. Also. BORK BORK BORK BORK BORK.
PLEASE NO. D:
G: So I get it as the only way to stop him is to let him get some pussy?
K: Apparently. Then why don’t they just give him the Wizard equivalent of singles and bring him to a Wizard Strip Club?
Actually wait, don’t. If I remember correctly, their currency is all coin-based, that doesn’t fare well with strippers.
“Okay.” I said sadly. We did dethz tuch sin. I went outside again sadly.
“What fucking happened?” asked Draco and Vampire.
“Yeah what happened?” asked Darkness, Willow and Boldy Mary?
K: Boldy Mary? You’re sure it’s not Italic Mary or Condensed Mary? Maybe Subscript or Strikeout Mary?
Fuckin’ A, I’m on a roll with Typography Puns. D:
G: your forgetting Underlined Mary. :3
I was about to tell them butt every1 was there. They were celebrating Lucian and Sirius being fond. Everyone was proud of me butt I jut wonted 2 talk 2 Draco. They were cheesing my name and some reporters were there, trying to interview Dumblydore. A banner was put up. Lotz of fucking prepz were there oviously tring 2 be b goffik wering the HIM sign on their handz- depite them not having akshelly heard of him. Even Mr. Noris looked happy. A blak and red cake had been brought out. Crabbe and Goyke set up some fireworx in the shape of skulls from Wesley’s Whizard Wises.
K: Finding two people doesn’t seem to warrant cake and fireworks. I should know.
A: ...FUCKING WESLEY CRUSHER FFFFFUUUUU.
I put on my Invisibility coke with Vampire and Draco and we sneaked outside 2gether.
A: Invisibility Coke? Is that like Crystal Pepsi?
K: Nah, that’s what people do when they drag their nose across a table. ;D
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